Excuse me while I raise a gentleman

When I was a child, I never thought twice about my father opening doors for me (or for others). It was just something that he did. He was courteous. He held out chairs for my mom and me. He offered his seat up to others. Whenever we walked outdoors, he always walked on the outside of me. This was the norm and I never thought anything of it.

Then I grew up, went out into the cruel world, and discovered my norm is not the world's.

The other night I witnessed a grown man, probably around 60, walk out of a door, in front of his extremely elderly mother, and not hold the door for her. Basically, let it shut in her face. Then to my surprise (and disgust), I watched him walk ahead of her, failing to assist her to the car or even open the car door for her. In that instant I made a decision, my son will never be that way.

I consider myself a Feminist. And by Feminist I mean someone who believes in equality for all, despite gender/sex, race or whatever. I do not think being a gentleman goes against this. Why? Because being kind is something everyone can be, even my daughter. I expect both of my children to hold doors open for others. I want both of them to give up their seats for the elderly or those in need. When they are older, I sure as Hell hope they assist their grandparents to the car, open car doors, and hold out an arm for those who can't walk unassisted.

Maybe it's because of how I grew up, but it baffles my mind that not everyone behaves as above described. I've watched grown men stand by idly as my mother and I unpacked our car full of luggage. I've seen a grown man take a seat only to have his mother say she was sitting there and for him to tell her to go find another chair. I've watched doors be slammed onto ladies' faces and elderly people struggle to open doors and I am shocked. I am disgusted. I am lost for I do not comprehend.

I am hoping that my children grow up the way I did and expect consideration for others to be the norm. I hope I can raise them to be aware of others' and their situations and be empathetic to those who need more than them. I hope that when I am old they never let a door slam in my face. For God help them if they do...I may be old but I'll still smack them with my cane.